Tuesday, December 29, 2009

i haven't quite recovered....

have you?

it's like all the happenings between Thanksgiving and the New Year have been piling up higher and higher, until you place one last thing on top and slowly step back thinking you have it all together, and then in the moment you breath a deep sigh of relief that you actually survived it all, your world comes crashing down around you in a big heap of a mess.

i mean seriously. wanna know how crazy i am? last night, i was finally frustrated enough about a ball being missing from the only game my youngest daughter wanted for Christmas, that i tore apart my entire house looking for it. still didn't find it. then, when i started back in the first room again, my husband reminded me that i need to let go of the obsessive-compulsive behavior and just move on. it's just a ball. but a ball we only had for 2 days before it went missing. grrrr.

does anyone else get overwhelmed with the busyness of the season?

quite possibly it's only because we have a birthday just 3 weeks prior to Christmas and then another just 30 days after Christmas. shhhhhhh. don't tell, but i shudder just thinking about planning another birthday party at the moment. maybe that's why we rarely have a January party for that January birthday. heh. we're lucky to get one in by April. but not this year, we will not disappoint.

anywho. December is a time of transition, the time i say goodbye to grandma until after Easter as she heads to Florida, a time that Emma is usually sick--this year is no different (bronchitis, ear infection & sinus infection), and the time that my house is soaring with tossed-to-the-side old things and the chaos of finding a spot for all the new things. it's also always the busiest time of the year for me with CHA (scrapbook) deadlines.

i am so thankful we have family that blesses us with new and lovely things, but the clutter that is issued in with our December birthday & Christmas doesn't mix well with a personality that can't stand clutter.

obviously, i have a hard time dealing with busyness & clutter. i'm working on it!

maybe it's just that i haven't had a moment to enjoy the season. it's been non-stop, go, go, go since Thanksgiving! insanely busy.

the week between Christmas and the New Year is probably *the* most difficult week for me---every.single.year. even moreso this year because while my family is at home, off of work (for the first time this year) and school, i'm working full-time hours with nothing at all to do! to know me is to know that there are lots of things that drive me batty, but at the tippy top of that list is wasting time doing nothing! i just can't do it.


that was a whole lot of random. and a whole lot of telling you who i really am and how i really don't deal so well with chaos. i promise, come january 2, i will return to the normal tania that you've come to know and love. hahahaha.

i'm ever so thankful right now for an office that is closed both thursday and friday. hello, 4 day weekend. i think i'll feel better and a little more in control after some rest & extra time to do some clutter control.

and find that missing ball. ah, yes, all will be right in the world when i find that stupid ball.

maybe i shouldn't have skipped a week of counseling this week, ya think?


  1. My hubby (who is OCD) will tell you I am a slob. Which I am ... there can't be two OCDs living in the same house. You say you would like that, but no. You would have different spots to put things. Trust me.
    Anyway, I do hate clutter so I started this year's holiday season by purging toys (and even some of my stuff!) BEFORE Christmas. The kids won't even notice (they didn't).
    It helps. I wish I had done the whole house, but let's be realistic! LOL! I know it doesn't help this year, but think forward to next!
    Oh, and breath. ;)

  2. because i am OCD and have lived with it for years i do get having the need to control what we cannot control. but with help i have learned to let go what i can't control. i still have urges. but i will share with you life falls in line much better when we let go and try to enjoy life. just try to let go a little each day and you will find it gets easier. but you really have to try. after while you don't have to try so hard, you will just be there. i promise.


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