second verse same as the first.

on september 24, i wrote..."so i've had it with myself and not blogging. somehow life went from super busy to flying at mega speed. i laugh at myself for thinking we were busy 4 months ago, because the last 4 months have defined busy in a whole new way. sheesh. still waiting for someone to invent a machine to slow time. somebody get on that, would ya?

i've had enough of the self-imposed guilt trips with myself for failing to document everyday life in the way that my brain thinks i should, so here i am making an attempt to drown out the voices in my head.

just so you know, this is going to be as random as random gets. and in order to make sure that this was something i could mark off my mental 'to-do' list, i've decided that editing and resizing photos was a waste of precious time. so let's just pretend there are no flaws, shall we?"

today, i'm going back to my school years and just gonna add the words....DITTO that! LOL.

i mean, seriously, this once a week blogging routine that i've got going on is even getting on my nerves.

now that i'm blogging over at Fiskateers.com, and Facebooking, and Instagramming.....well, ya know. i just haven't made it a choice to keep this space updated like i want to.

to all my family and friends (and internet strangers).....i'm sorry i've been a blogging failure in this space. i'm really trying to get into the mindset that every blog post doesn't have to be epic or have a new revelation or a pretty project i've created to go along with it.

from this day forward, i'm hereby giving myself permission to:

1. blog whenever i want (i have this crazy mindset that if i don't blog first thing in the morning that i need to wait until the next morning and well, the next morning comes and the cycle repeats. i promise i'm only slightly neurotic.)
2. blog whatever i want (even if it's just a random "i don't know what the heck i'm doing in this world" confession)
3. blog without guilt if i go a week without blogging (yeah, riiiiiiiiiiiiiight. that'll never happen. LOL. let's pretend, shall we?)

isn't there some rule that says if i don't blog about it, it never happened?

randomness from the willis house

so i've had it with myself and not blogging.  somehow life went from super busy to flying at mega speed.  i laugh at myself for thinking we were busy 4 months ago, because the last 4 months have defined busy in a whole new way. sheesh.  still waiting for someone to invent a machine to slow time. somebody get on that, would ya?

i've had enough of the self-imposed guilt trips with myself for failing to document everyday life in the way that my brain thinks i should, so here i am making an attempt to drown out the voices in my head.

just so you know, this is going to be as random as random gets.  and in order to make sure that this was something i could mark off my mental 'to-do' list, i've decided that editing and resizing photos was a waste of precious time. so let's just pretend there are no flaws, shall we?

spidergirl has an on again off again relationship with her smile lately, but when she flashes those pearly whites at you, it's the cutest smile you've ever seen. seriously lights up the room. she's been off the charts emotional about anything and everything lately and i thought to myself "tania, if you think this is bad, just wait a few more years 'til those teenage hormones kick in." anywho. she was super proud to be wearing a towel on her wet hair after her shower just like mommy does. not sure what it is about a twisted towel---ashlyn went through the same fascination.

ashlyn has been spending her free-time drawing, creating, crafting, etc.  her hands are almost always covered with paint or sharpie marker. her latest creations are these 'made-to-order' phone pouches made from folded notebook paper that's been reinforced with duct tape.  she's ready to go into business folks!

just spidergirl looking so very little and quite adorable.  there's so many times i look at her and marvel at how grown up she looks, but so many other times where i realize how very little she still is.  it's time playing a cruel little game of tug-o-war with my heart.

if you've been reading for some time, you're aware that this sight is nothing new to behold.  my studio is in a constant state of disarray.  i'm so not complaining because that means there's been a flurry of activity keeping things hopping.  this summer has been one deadline on the heels of another and i've loved every moment of it.  but, really. it's time to clean! this i know.

we've been spending lots of time with sore hind ends from sitting on the bleachers in the observation deck at gymnastics for two reasons....

1. because spidergirl begged and begged and begged and begged some more to take gymnastics just like her big sister from just about the time ashlyn started her first lesson.  but that pesky asthma flaring up non-stop the first 4 months of this year kept my answer at a firm NO. but over the last several months her doctors seemed to have found the right combination of medicines to keep her well-controlled and well, i didn't have a reason to say no anymore.   she's over the moon thrilled, can't you tell! :)

2. because ashlyn was moved from 1 hour a week training to 3 hours a week training in the pre-team class.  but she was in pre-team for a whole week before they asked her to join competitive team!  she's super stoked.  so now she trains 5 hours a week and loves every second of it. my wallet is crying in pain though.  competitive gymnastics is off the charts EXPENSIVE.

this is how we roll when the pain is out of control.  heating pad and puzzles. oh joy.

shark week was celebrated with baths in the dark with glowsticks and.....

floating sharks.  eeeeeps!

my house is littered with little trinkets that are near and dear to spidergirls heart.  finding them laying around everywhere is almost as annoying as stepping on a stray lego on the floor.  she's completely smitten with this nerdy chipmunk brought back from Disney.

peace.  did you know that Friday was World Peace Day?  it was.  the girls' school did activities all day long to celebrate peace.  ashlyn had written an essay on peace and was chosen along with 9 other kids from the school to read her essay during an assembly that day. of course, i know that has nothing to do with a photo of spidergirl's backpack. lol.

this is HUGE news around here.........doug.ate.a.salad.  whoa. never thought i'd see the day where my meat and potatos man would start eating all kinds of vegetables and actually LIKE them.

awwww. i'll never get tired of looking at pictures of her missing her two front teeth.  anywho. we're still making the 100 mile roundtrip adventure every friday morning to the allergist for spidergirls' allergy shot. not my favorite outing of the week, but we try to make it fun. she always takes along some sort of stuffie to keep her company.  this is her Duffy bear--a souvenir she brought back from Disney.

it's always extra stressful for me when ashlyn joins us because the two of them together in a waiting room with nowhere to burn off excess energy is a recipe for obnoxiousness. 

this pretty little batch of fabric kept me busy the last few weeks for a deadline. it was fun to play with fabric again, but i think i've decided that i'll stick to my paper. i'm so much more of an instant gratification project person these days. maybe some day when life isn't so busy i'll enjoy fabric more than paper again.

that's all i've got folks.  pretty lame. i know. 

the Willis' and the not bummer summer!

my presence in this space has decreased greatly over the last several months, but the fun and excitement we've been sharing as a family hasn't slowed a bit!  i just can't find enough hours in the day to blog about it all, LOL!

i have a backlog of photos and stories...that, honestly, i may or may not get around to ever sharing here.  hoping and aiming for more of the 'may' share rather than 'may not', but i can't make any promises.

life is busier than ever and is treating me better than i could have imagined looking forward from just a few years ago.  funny how time and patience changes things--and the right medical treatment (more on that later).

we're on a mission to finish out the summer just as strong as we started it with a goal of being able to say "2012 was the BEST summer EVER!" and totally a not bummer summer. :)

we've swam so much we look like wrinkled prunes. we've eaten enough popcicles to serve and army. we just returned from walking miles upon miles at the most magical place on earth! now, we're looking forward to a trip to the Ohio State Fair and giddy about taking the girls to their very first concert!

hard to believe the girls will be headed back to school in less than 3 weeks! guess i better get busy making lists of what clothing they need and start shopping for those supplies---my favorite part! i think i look forward to new school supplies more than the kids do. :)

i'll tell you what i am looking forward to come August 20th. i'm looking forward to reclaiming my daily 2-hour window of quiet studio time/blogging time once they are back in school!  i miss my uninterrupted morning time something fierce---but i still wouldn't trade the memories we're making to have it all back.

what kind of adventures has your summer taken you on?

i haven't given up on blogging...

not yet anyway. life has been crazypants the last 10 months. and as a result i haven't made adequate time to blog much of anything other than what my hands have been busy creating.

why? well, because i've decided that i feel so much better when i get 8 hours of sleep a night. imagine that. so, yes, dear friends. i'm choosing sleep over documenting the crazy.

trust me though. every day, as things happen, i'm composing blog posts in my brain. now if i can just get them transcribed from my brain into actual blog posts all would be right in my world.

i thought i'd have plenty of time to get a consistent round of blog updates in while my family was away for spring break, but, you know what happens when i make plans? the universe laughs in my face and throws me some curveballs. that's what. ha.

so, to all of you who check in on me consistently, even though i'm quite inconsistent as of late, i thank you for coming back to visit me.

and next time i go 2 weeks without announcing a winner for a promised giveaway, someone say something! LOL.

thank you to those who took time to offer their input on my post asking what you'd like to see in my upcoming training reels for LYB.

so the winner is.........Cynthia B! so, Cynthia, please email with your mailing information so i can get your goodies out to you.

i've got some exciting stuff to share. soon. stick with me. :)

hello, my name is tania, and.....

hello, my name is tania and i made some really cute bunny softies out of felt and knee-high socks from Target. you should whip yourself up one or two. it's easy, i promise. just follow my tutorial over on the Fiskars website: Bunny Plushies by Tania Willis

hello, my name is tania and my full-time job is running from one doctor to the next. no, seriously. it is. 19 visits in the last 81 days. :(

hello, my name is tania and i'm really thankful that doug took spidergirl to the emergency room for her asthma attack two nights ago and gave me a break from the medical madness that consumes my life. (4th visit to the ER for the same thing in 4 months time)

hello, my name is tania and i really, really miss sharing stories and inspiring through my experiences. we've had lots of them to share.

hello, my name is tania and i currently have 10 blog posts in draft format waiting for me to finish and post.

hello, my name is tania and i'm married to one awesometastic, fantastic dude. i'd seriously be in a lot more pain without his consistent unwavering help.

hello, my name is tania and i'm currently bargaining with God to just heal my daughter from allergies and asthma already. for the first time ever she said "mommy, why did God make me this way?" how do you answer that one!?

hello, my name is tania and i need a maid to help get my house under control.........any volunteers?

hello, my name is tania and wish i had the brain cells to write something of substance in this space.

hello, my name is tania and my blogging time is up because i need to head out the door to take spidergirl to the doctor............again. hoping this is the last time for a looooooong time. chances are it won't be.

hello, my name is tania and i'm done complaining now.

oh, wait....one more thing.....
hello, my name is tania and i'm curious to know after having to read my name all those times, how do you pronounce "tania"?

(for the record i pronounce it "tahn-ya"....much like you'd say "tonya"....but i've heard lots of fascinating pronunciations in my life!)

thank you......just, thank you.

to all of you who took a moment out of your day to stop in and comment on my last post........THANK YOU. i read every single one of them....most with tears in my eyes. who knew, little ole me could have such a widespread impact on people around the globe.

means the world to me that ya'll care so much that you take time out of your day to stop in and visit with me.

lately, 've had a serious case of the self-doubt gremlins that i can't seem to shake. which usually happens when i have a short period of time where i'm over-extended and not taking time to blog through the millions of thoughts bouncing around in my head.

i have so much to share both personal and business related. but it'll have to wait just one more day. i really honestly miss the ritual of sitting down to pound out a post every single day.

after tomorrow i have no deadlines on my calendar for 2 weeks! that's a major break for me. :)

but, now i have to get out the door to the hospital to take ashlyn to the orthodontist. today, they put the actual braces on and start turning the key on that palatal expander.

be prepared for a whole lot of healing humor to come to this space soon, because so far this experience with a sensory kid has made me feel like i'm going to have a nervous breakdown. no lie.

Lord, give her strength. give me patience with her sensory meltdowns. i'm begging here. do you hear me!?

random hodge-podge...

• seen on facebook today: "my daily routine: get up, be amazing, go back to bed." yep, pretty much my life goal. aiming high, my friends. aiming high.


• i never, ever take my nose ring out (except during an MRI or xray), but i somehow lost my nose ring yesterday morning. i felt kinda naked without it. still baffled at how/when it came out without me feeling it. weird.


• so after work i stop at the local tattoo shop to purchase new jewelry to put in....$2 for a sterile surgical quality stud........score!


• but, um, yeeeeeeeeeeeeouch! um, yeah. i think my nose piercing closed up in the 8 hours it was out. forcing the new ring through? not the most brilliant idea i've ever had. omgosh. omgosh. omgosh. oweeeeee.


• i had to re-pierce it using a regular earring, then put the new corkscrew stud in. it feels like a new piercing all over again. boo.


• again, today i chose to forgive myself for my parenting shortfalls and let Him smother me with an overwhelming helping of grace and hope with a fragile kind of hope that my kids only remember the good stuff.


• what? i can't wake up, be awesome, and go back to bed every day, ya know. lol. just kidding. i try to be awesome. just sometimes my brain goes on a little vacation and then i'm not so awesome.


• if i haven't said it enough, i'll say it again. i'm thankful for medicine and insurance and the hope that a new more aggressive treatment will have me feeling so much less pain. so blessed (but still a little nervous). upcoming treatment has some serious, scary side effects. say a little prayer for me, if you don't mind.


• in my inbox today: "Just because someone may find fault, cast stones, or disagree with you, Tania , doesn't mean they don't adore you. Actually, Tania , it's these same folks who usually do."


• thanks mystery inbox messanger. i needed to be reminded of that.


• saw this on pinterest: "what screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it is supposed to be." true story.


• and lastly....palette expanders are of the devil. true story. ashlyn is pretty much living on chocolate icecream alone. everything else gets stuck including her nightly pills. NOT fun at all for all parties involved.

if i tiptoe back in.....

will you not notice that i've been a little quiet when it comes to things on the homefront?

i don't know what my problem is lately, but i feel a little tongue-tied. i have gobs and gobs of stories (& pictures) from clear back to fourth of july and i just don't even know where to begin. it all feels so very overwhelming to me right now.

in the past several weeks i've started a dozen or more posts talking about more transparent type things and not just skimming the surface of what we did or where we went, but then i get a little self-conscious and hesitate to put it all out there. nothing i type has felt right. yet i have this deep desire to connect.

something is quietly telling me to be still.

i've been going through this stage of wanting to keep stories about my family to myself for a few months and i'm not quite sure where it's coming from because, hello.....telling stories is an integral part of what i do for a living. not to mention a big part of how i connect with others.

life just feels weird. i feel like i'm trying to find my place in this world all over again.

that ugly beast called 'perfection' has crept back in and is causing a struggle within my heart. it tells the most believable lies, ya know.

i'm back in another 'parenting is hard' stage. parenting a special needs child is even more difficult. parenting a special needs child with medical issues is even more difficult than that.

but hey. i'm always up for a challenge. :) sometimes with more confidence than others. now is not one of those times. ahem.

wow, that all sounded so melodramtic. this is exactly why i started a dozen or more posts and all the while wore out my backspace key doing so. LOL. i'm so confused i don't even make much sense to myself. ha.

anywho.
in other news:

• my sister-in-law is moving back to columbus by october 1st! :) i love her so. and watching my kids play with her kids isn't nothing short of delightful. seriously. i see some sleepovers with cousins in the future! :)


• ashlyn has been through the initial consult for the interceptive phase of braces to correct an open bite and anterior cross bite. she was accepted into the orthodontic program at our Children's Hospital. she's super excited and only wanted to know if they had rubberbands that were turquoise and if they could do patterns. yes and yes.


• we made it 2 weeks into the school year without being tardy! awesome. (we were 1 minute late today)


• i've been feeling marvelous for the past 2 weeks! me thinks this chemo is actually doing something.


• we are back to just a family of 4 now. for the past several months doug was assigned as a legal supervisor to a friend and his children as they were in the midst of a custody battle. we had them 2-3 weeknights and all day every other weekend. ugly situation that is now resolved. he would do just about anything for a friend.


• i've been working like a madwoman in the studio! looooooooove it. you'll see everything here on the blog when i can share. i SO wish i could show everything now.


• my studio is absolutely atrocious. i might need an intervention soon. ha.

that's about it folks. kinda all over the place, eh?

taking it all in....

the last few weeks--few months really, have been so exhausting. i kinda feel like i can't really focus on any one thing at all. just feeling pulled in a million different directions.

it happens every year so it shouldn't come as much of a surprise, but somehow it catches me off-guard. once spring break is here, the rest of the educational year feels like one big super-fast downhill slide as we race to the last day of school.

in the next 10 days we have the: artshow, book fair, carnival, two doctor visits, kindergarten graduation, academic scholar ceremony, end of year assembly, spelling bee, and i'm sure i'm forgetting something. are you as tired reading it as i am thinking about it? LOL.

today feels like one of those days where i just need to take a deep breath and exhale slowly.

but....thanks to a current regimen of steriods in my system, my brain feels like it's on a continuous hampster wheel spinning out of control! add in a fair dose of drug-induced nervousness and i just feel......twitchy. i seriously wish i had an on-off switch to make it all go away right about now. i keep telling myself five more day, just five more days. then my body can detox from the 'roid rage. LOL.

the positive side to all that is that the rest of my body feels fantastic! can i get a hallelujah!? wooooo! take that arthritis! hiyah!

*i feel good! nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. so good. so good.* (of course you know there was a wild guitar strumming visual along with that, right?)

can we say energy buzz? oh yeah, baby. i've got one heck of an energy buzz.....going on a total of 12 hours sleep over the past 6 days. i just wish all those non-sleep hours were productive hours.

no such dice.

i keep telling myself "focus, tania. just focus." but, i.cannot.focus. do you have any clue how frustrating that is!? LOL.

my pain level has decreased significantly. but, i'm none too pleased that it took steriods and nights of my heart racing to get to this point. i never ever get used to the elevated heartrate and the skipped beats. it makes my stomach feel like i've just accelerated down a steep rollercoaster incline every time it skips. it's one thing if you're actually on the coaster and can anticipate what's coming, but when you get that feeling a couple thousand times a day and never know when it's coming it's quite unsettling.

constantly robbing peter to pay paul in this 'ole body of mine. *sigh*

anywho. all that to say, my goal for the next week is to take time to take care of me as i finish up this course of steriods. take time to take lots of deep breaths. take time to exhale slowly. and take time to just be gentle on myself.

i can't wait to get back to daily blogging. oh, how i miss it. i'm a girl who craves routine and not blogging is throwing everything all outta whack.

stuff currently germinating in my noggin:

• spring break wrap up (yes, there are still photos from spring break 20 days ago!)
• more scrapbooking shares
  
• family pictures at the gardens
  
• my summer must-do list
  
• the world of pinterest
  
• etsy update
  
• exciting things on the horizon
  

but for now..........deep breath. exhale. deep breath. exhale. deeeeeeeeep breath. exhale.

i love you guys! thanks for stopping in---don't forget the Echo Park giveaway in the post below if you haven't entered already. :)

this mess here.....

was created last night while making one of my most favorite projects EVER. it was for an upcoming video tutorial i'll be sharing really soon----like hopefully the first of next week. :) the mess is way worse than this picture lets on, though. i'm kinda lost as to where to start to even clean it up. eeeks. in other news:

• i'm stoked that there are only 4 more days of crazy at work. for those of you who don't know, i work part-time at an accounting firm.....but lately have been working full-time hours because the tax deadline is upon us.


• those extended hours are the very reason this blog has been lacking in the new post department lately. oy! but there is an end in sight!


• those hours are also the reason that my entire body feels like one big knot. i need a massage, like yesterday!


• i'm excited for next Friday!


• why you ask? well because it starts a 10 day vacation for me!!! well, glory be! i'm beside myself excited for it. i haven't had a vacation in 10 years.


• it's just me and the girls that'll be home, and we aren't going away, but there are lots of adventures planned for the week. :) i'm sure you'll hear about them all after they happen.


• i plan to exercise my camera well.


• also, in preparation for their Spring Break, i've stocked their crafting cabinet and have a ton of ideas pinned on my kidART wall on Pinterest. :)


• we'll be trying our hand at Tie Dye shirts too. i'm quite giddy about that!


• i'm working on taking pictures of their entire crafting area and storage. i think it's always fun to see they way other people handle/corral art supplies, so, hey, i'll share mine too for those that are interested.


• of course there will also be the usual Easter egg coloring, and hunting, and celebrating.


• one bummer we'll deal with on the first day of break is going to Children's hospital for ashlyn to have her second dental appointment with sedation to have a tooth removed and a space maintainer appliance put in. :(


• otherwise, there's not much else happening around these parts...........just busy, busy, busy!


• i'm working on getting back into a daily posting routine though. thanks for hanging with me through the quiet times. :)

happy tuesday......or wednesday...........or whatever day it is! (they are all blending together lately)

best of ScrapScene 2010

hello friends!

if you haven't noticed, i've been struggling to hold it all together lately.

in a perfect world, i would have had my december daily wrapped up just a few days after Christmas, then my traditional year end wrap up post posted, then a few words about the New Year and what i'm focusing on.

but.....

it isn't a perfect world. *sigh*

i've got just 6 days to wrap up on my december daily posting--i'm hoping to get them all posted in one day so i can move along.

that won't be today though.

ashlyn is really sick and we're heading into the doctor. can you believe it!?! we made it THREE WHOLE DAYS into the new year before having to go to the doctor. oh joy!

anywho.

in the meantime, check out this year end wrap-up post over at ScrapScene: The Best of ScrapScene 2010.

i'm thrilled to have made the list with my Altering Fabrics with Ink tutorial.........right there along with all my other favorite teachers from at Get it Scrapped! there's some fabulous tutorials on that list. you might want to bookmark the link for a rainy day. :)

see you back here soon. i've got some fun stuff to share throughout the month.

on why i'm not a fan of school photos....

a month or so ago, i sent the girls off to school, all beautified and ready to smile for the camera for what's known as "Fall School Photos". they begged and begged for me to place an order.

let me tell you a little secret......

I DON'T LIKE SCHOOL PHOTOS! heeeee.

there's all sorts of reasons why, but anwho, back to what i was saying.

reluctantly, i looked at the order form and discovered that this time i had the option to order only a single sheet without having to buy an entire package first. to the tune of $10 a sheet. *eyes bugging out* what a rip-off.

but for posterity's sake, i gave in, wrote two checks, let them pick their outfit and their pose and called it good.

here's what i got in return.

this is Ashlyn, nearly 9 and in 3rd grade.

here's how i imagine this went down......
"okay, honey, on the count of three we'll take the picture, so get ready to smile. one........two"

yeah. looks like they didn't quite make it to three before they got trigger happy on the shutter release.

she looks like a deer in headlights on the way to a smile but didn't quite make it. her eyes look completely non-expressive and just doesn't look like the kid i know at all.

i mean ya'll have seen her photos here on the blog, right? she looks scared in this one.

now here is Spidergirl, almost 6, and in kindergarten.

so, yeah, she has a nice smile, not that crazy cheezy grin she's been flashing me lately, but did they really have to pose her looking like she can't wait to be done so she can run to the loo and empty her bladder!?

*sigh*

they are using digital cameras for pete's sake.

anywho. they take photos of kids in our school district twice a year. Fall and Spring.

in the fall, you don't get to see them before you order and in the Spring, they send you home a dozen (or more) sheets of photos and let you pick and choose on whether to buy any of them or not.

this might make me sound quite pathetic and like i'm a bit egotistical--and i don't mean for it to come across that way at all, but i have my own camera, thank you very much, and my photos mean more to me than anything any school has ever sent home for me to choose from.

i do realize that for some kids, this is the only photo they have taken of themselves each year. thinking about that makes me sad.

but really, these photos i'll treasure, for they remind me of their personalities, their quirks and whatnot.

like:

ashlyn begging for her hair to be up in the "wedding" do. heh. i spent a hour curling and putting it up with her whining every time i curled a new strand. (sensory issues + touching her hair = sending her over the edge) too bad you can't see the outfit that she freaked out over not being able to find the night before. she's obsessed with that skin tight pink laced cami with her super fly dark denim leg hugging jeans. and she won't keep her paws off my jewelry. she's also super sensitive and very uncomfortable in front of strangers. obvious from the photo, yes? she looks scared every single year. ahhhhhhhhhhh, memories. :)

and

spidergirl goes back and forth about wanting to dress girly and wanting to dress looking like a tomboy. this day, she wanted to look pretty with tights and dress shoes and have a pony in her hair. i let them pick their background and of course she'd pick the rainbow. i *knew* she would. she colors everything in rainbow color, she loves tie-dye, psychadelic looking stuff. she also smiles for the camera for anyone but ME! LOL. just the polar opposite of her sister. she's spunky and outgoing and doesn't have a shy bone in her body. all totally visible in this photo.

so even though i'm not in love with these photos, they'll still remind me of all of this. so, i guess i'll keep 'em.

random...

meet mr. owl. he's my most recent home decor addition. isn't he so cute & quirky!? he's so perfectly ME! i purchased him from Oliver Brotzge Studios, an artist friend of mine. he makes the most amazing pieces of art out of dense foam that he concretes, paints, then applies sealant.

when i saw this owl, i told him i thought people would go crazy over them. so he listed just a few in his etsy shop. he's seriously, the most talented artist i've ever seen.

in other news, it's feeling like a random kind of day.

so, here goes it....

home: with the weather changing quickly, i'm starting to feel the walls closing in already. there's just too much stuff in this little house of mine. i'm trying to purge through things without getting overwhelmed. that's easier said than done. does anyone else start feeling this way once fall hits?

the playroom needs a major overhaul. trying to decide what should stay and what should go is daunting. i'm thinking putting half of it away in storage might be the best for now. there have been several times when we donate something, only to buy it again (secondhand) because the girls fell in love with it all over again. *sigh*

the girls: they are at the age where the oldest is growing out of all the 'pretend' play toys and picture books but not yet growing into the pre-teen stuff. just stuck in the middle. i've tried interesting her in some 'new to her' crafts, like latch-hook and stitching, but it's a no go. all she wants is to turn the playroom into a schoolroom. so she can boss teach spidergirl all she needs to know.

the youngest has a growing interest in learning to read and wanting to play barbies, and all-around just annoying the crap out of the oldest. this parenting stuff & keeping everyone happy at the same time is hard work! LOL.

workouts: for an ENTIRE WEEK, i had very minimal pain--i felt great! the first two days, i didn't sleep because it just felt so weird to be almost pain-free. i'll take no sleep over pain anyday. that all went down the drain saturday though. you're probably guessing.........the pain is back. i guess i overdid it during my workout saturday.

last night was my worst performance ever at my workout. i walked slower than molasses. seriously. sloooooooooow. no faster than 1.8 miles hour. i made it 1.6 miles in 50 minutes. nothing extra. no weights, no squats, no inclines above 2.0. but, hey....i still went. that counts for something, right?

so now, feel great or not, i won't be doing inclines over 5.0.

medical: pain? yep. vision blurred & double? occassionally. headaches? gone. new symptoms? yep. i see the neurologist in the morning.

blogging: my dashboard tells me i have 912 posts on this blog. WOW, that's a whole lot of talking. but, 36 of them are drafts. LOL. trying to decide which one to finish first is a wee bit overwhelming for me. with titles like these, which one would you pick?

"three things"
"expectations"
"happiness stealers"
"letters i'll never send"
"mmmm. sweet candy for my creative soul"
"did i ever tell you...."
"guess who says that"
"i want this kitchen"
"she's gonna be a shoe designer"
"our sensory journey"

my husband: as a tiki. wicked cool, right!? another piece of art by mr. oliver brotzge. i told you he was talented.

and just like that....

seven days went by! whoa!

i think that's the longest blog break i've taken in a while. and it didn't even take my dad harrassing me for a new post to get back at it. ha. *waving hi dad*

anywho.

today, i'm popping in to share a peek of the August kit from The Story Matters. i LOOOOOVE the colorfulness of it and can't wait to get some new stories down on a few layouts!

other randomness...

• i've enjoyed a week of doing pretty much nothing.
• including not blogging.
• i have to admit, i kinda enjoyed the break. maybe a little too much.
• i've watched more tv in the last week than i've watched in the last year.
• Doug got sucked into the Bachelorette this season. that Ali is a cute one.
• so is Ashlyn--they watch it together. she's ridiculously giddy about the Frank drama that they keep teasing about in commercials.
• & i've fallen for American's Got Talent. hand whistling? who knew.
• spent last evening out with one of my bridesmaids at PF Changs. mmmm.
• PF Changs has free lettuce wraps coupons HERE.
• you do have to insert your email, but rest assured, they haven't spammed me yet. just emailed me the coup.
• it expires on my birthday! i think i should go again. hee.
• CHA deadlines are still in full swing, thus the reason i haven't had much scrapbooking to share lately.
• but all these secret projects mean an August full of scrappy shares! you're gonna looooove the new stuff.
• spent Wednesday at the doctor with Ashlyn. in the morning when dropping her off at Vacation Bible School, i grabbed her chin for a kiss goodbye and she pulled away complaining of pain.
• turns out she had a firm, painful lump, quarter-sized.
• doctor diagnosed it as a "reactive, submental lymph node, non-matted, firm, not hard, movable". all of those description are good things. not suspicious of scary things.
• he suspects it was caused from a suppressed immune system from her chemo.
• today, it's substantially smaller and barely tender. thanking God!
• spidergirl is struggling through these 90+ degree, high humidity days. very raspy & horse. lethargic. inhalers are on stand-by.
• the Mister has no residual side-effects or evidence of the massive rash he had from the antibiotic. :)
• i hoping for a small reprieve from the sweltering heat so i can play with my camera outside this weekend. but it doesn't look promising. :(
• and i'm anxiously awaiting the arrival of the August kit from The Story Matters! this one was designed by the talented Megan Klauer. she has lots of sneak peeks on her blog.

full reveal of the kit is August 5th!

happy friday!

phew.

what a busy few days it has been--really what a busy few weeks. shoot. who am i kidding it's been busy around here for months. *deep breath*

i can't really form coherent thoughts right now, or think of anything witty to say. but i want to remember the busyness of our lives, because, albeit hard to believe, everyone tells me to cherish it, because one day i'll miss the action-packed days of raising little ones.

UPDATES

DOUG: he is looking remarkably better. and feeling better too. the rash doesn't look inflammed and angry anymore, but it is still covering the majority of his body. the swelling and redness in his face has gone down substantially. his trunk used to look so much worse than his extremeties, but now it's just the opposite. he's itching like crazy, but i can't convince him to try an oatmeal bath. his biggest complaint beyond the itching is that the steriods are making him unable to sleep. :(

SCRAPBOOKING: as you can see by the photo above, my studio is somewhat of a disaster. this picture is the most 'clean-looking' of the ones i took. if i get brave i'll show you the mega mess. remember it's CHA time. yesterday, i mailed off 32 projects, an 8lb box!, to karen foster. one deadline down, a few more to go. and there's at least 15 loads of clean, unfolded laundry in towering baskets in my studio. oh joy! i have applied my dump, sort method to them, so at least i know which basket to go to when i need to find something.

EMMA: she is having a rough time adjusting to the summer schedule at daycare. every day, except fridays, they go on a fieldtrip since she's now with the school-agers. only problem is, she still wears out easily. she's been having lots of meltdowns after school and falling asleep before 8pm. some of the mood swings are from not eating or drinking enough thanks to moderate/severe reflux she was diagnosed with recently. for now we're trying medication....i can't stand the thought of her needing another surgery. good news: since we started medicine she gained 3 pounds!! yay!

ASHLYN: she's currently obsessed with boondoggling, since one of the teachers at daycare taught her how. she's got some money saved up and has been begging us to take her to hobby lobby to buy more plastic lacing. is the perfect project for travel & waiting rooms. it's been a long time coming, but i must say that she's been doing so well with sensory input lately. while visiting friends last night, i noticed her ability to adapt and cope with sensory overload. she still withdraws, but the migraines are few and far between. this is a busy weekend, so her ability to adapt to her surroundings and avoid meltdowns will be tested. she's also become a lover of water---i mean no fear whatsoever! i remember the day we celebrated her dumping water on her head like it was yesterday, after full blown meltdowns over just a drop of water touching her face. my girl. *sigh* she's growing up.

ME: trying SO hard to remind myself that CHA syndrome comes and goes. my house is soaring. remember when i described it last year? reading it over and over helps. i've still got a smile on my face after a reunion of sorts with Jonny Mac and other friends. but that's a story for when i can make sense of my thoughts. the visit was wonderful. way too short, but i feel recharged and refreshed and encouraged. he's just that kind of person. you always walk away feeling like you gained the world. thinking about the two upcoming procedures that i'll have done prior to the decision for the type of surgery i'll need. excited about the possibility of being pain-free most days, but bumming about the fact that the research study for my heart has been postponed three months in a row.

tonight is Red, White & Boom where we'll watch a 25 minute firework display and i'll think to myself...gosh, we're so lucky to live here.

a spring card & other randomness...

• another card using up some scraps of Garden Variety by Cosmo Cricket that i featured yesterday & the Spring has Sprung is an SRM sticker from the Express Yourself Easter sheet.

• it's been a while since i've blogged on a daily basis. i miss it.
• all throughout the day, i get lots of random ideas of stories that need told.
  
• but now that i have a quick minute to blog, i can't remember any of them.
• honestly, i feel like i forgot how to blog. writers block, i suppose?

so, how's about some randomness....

• only 22 more days until April 15th!!! only those working in an accounting office are counting down, i'm sure. tax season surely doesn't end on the 15th, but the stress level at work will go waaaaaaay down after that.
  
• Easter is just around the corner---that means little grandma with the crumbles on her face will be home soon! YAY!
• this week i've been working full-time hours at work. it's kicking my butt.
• today i'm taking a small break from the heart monitor. i'm extremely allergic to the electrode patches and have huge welts everywhere that they've been applied. itchy & painful.
• i'm a little big closer to that etsy update, but it won't get done before the weekend.
• the only positive of a racing heart? losing weight without trying.
  
• the major negative? i'm tired. all.day.long. but can't sleep at night. so not fun.
• i'm looking for some fun, creative yet do-able Easter egg coloring ideas.....other than regular dye. what kind of creative spin do you incorporate when coloring eggs?
  

well, hello mr. sun

(print from THE LOVE SHOP)

thank God for the truth of that statement, yes?

yesterday was a doozy, and went a little something like this....

2:30AM Spidergirl, wide awake cause she's hearin' scary noises
5:15AM Doug puts her in bed with me and jumps in the shower
5:25AM His alarm goes off on his cellphone and Ashlyn is startled awake
5:26AM Ashlyn jumps out of bed to grab his phone and F R E A K S out
5:26AM My heartrate goes from 80 to 200 beats per minute
5:30AM Doug turns the light on and says "wow, it's gonna be a goooooooood day" in the most sarcastic tone he can muster
6:00AM I float back to dreamland
6:05AM I get punched in the face by Spidergirl---she was just checkin to see if i was still there
6:30AM Finally give up on getting any more sleep

the next 2 hours are a blur.....but there was lots of whining about "my ear hurts", "the tv is too loud", "i need a bandaid", "those scary noises won't go away"

8:30AM The doctor is called for Spidergirl's earache (and scary noises she's hearing---crackling) I suspect swimmer's ear since I can't even get near her ear.
8:45AM Drive the Princess to school
9:15AM Back home
10:00AM Leave for doctor
10:30AM Doctor confirms swimmers ear
11:00AM Grab Spidergirl some lunch
11:45AM Drive her to preschool
12:15PM Arrive at Pharmacy
12:45PM Jaw hits the floor as I'm told her eardrops are $25! the bottle holds no more than a tablespoon of medicine. Before insurance they were $143.
1:00PM Arrive at work
3:30PM Leave work for counseling

yadda, yadda, yadda..........


(print from Farouche)

but today? you can throw just about anything my way today.....because, TODAY, the SUN is shining!!!!

it's such a spectacular sight. so bright and sunshiny! and WARM! ahhhhhhhhhh. Spring, please hurry!

adding this to my 'after CHA is over list'

along with taking the tree down, i'm adding THIS FABULOUS TUTORIAL to my list of 'things to do when CHA is over'. it's worth the click over there, i promise.

what else is going down in the house, you ask?

• the princess girl is counting down days to her birthday with a small stack of post-it notes thumbtacked to the wall. she's been reminding us at least 392018409 times a day that her birthday is only 16 days away.that
• that same girl came to me yesterday and said "mommy, stuff on my leg is now on my lower back/bum." seriously? yep seriously. i didn't even know what to say. instead i gave her a big hug. this stuff is spreading like crazy.
• that same girl is grumpy and nursing a headache & accompanying goose egg from running smack into the bathroom door. she's takes after me....total clutz.
• spidergirl has discovered the world of Xbox 360 games and it's rather difficult to peel her away from them.
• i woke up friday to discover the refridgerator warm, but the freezer frozen. called service for them to come tell me, they can't find anything wrong with it. $70 service call later and it seems to be working perfectly again. *sigh*
• i have exactly 20 more layouts & 5 more cards to do in the next 5 days.
• and probably a few more for good measure.
• surprisingly my house isn't in a sad state of chaos, but rather tidy.
• but we're living out of laundry baskets using my favorite laundry sorting method to make it through these deadlines. don't judge.
• yes. my tree is still up.
• ashlyn has taken to not only writing notes with questions, ending with the infamous 'circle one, yes or no,' but now they are delivered by way of poor flying paper airplanes launched from the top of the steps that somehow hit you in the noggin every single time. hysterical.
• today's gonna be a good, good day. i got a feeling.
• my boy crush is going to be on Extreme Home Maker tonight. mmmmmm.
• and americal idol starts tuesday! yes, yes, yes!!!
• i think that's enough random nonsense for one blog entry.
• it's time for me to widdle down that number of assignments.

dear subway man, you ain't foolin' nobody!

• dear Emily, congratulations! you're the winner! email me using that link over there under my photo ------> and i'll get back to you with details on registering.
• dear Elizabeth, the registration link for class is working now....sorry for the inconvenience.
  
• dear Subway man, i saw you yesterday and i had to bite my cheeks to keep from laughing. just so you know those teeth you had coated in silver-----silver aluminum foil---you ain't foolin' anybody! it made you talk all funny and just looked rather ghetto.
• dear makers of Dr. Pepper, do you think you could call a meeting with your Product Development team and figure out a way to bring back caffeine free Dr. Pepper-----that isn't diet? please and thank you.
• dear aunt donna, i haven't forgotten about you. and i still want to sew. time is scarce right now. i'm sorry.
• dear neighbor girls, 2:30AM is NEVER a good time to go for a dip in the pool if you can't put a muzzle on it. your loud, obnoxious behavior & foul language was quite disrespectful and dealt me a killer headache from not being able to sleep all night. i'm not too happy with you.
• dear husband, they are demanding another guest appearance by the funny man, get on it, would ya? ps.....thank you for grocery shopping so i could sleep off the headache.
• dear davidbeckhamphotography.com, thank you for taking personal time out of your schedule to take pictures of the Root log cabin before it was dismantled. i just discovered them last week and feel like i'm forever indebted to you.
  
• dear ashlyn, i'm so proud of you taking initiative to help mommy fold laundry and doing so without being asked and without complaining.
  
• dear dad, what size shoe do you wear? no reason. just wondering. dum-dee-dum.
• dear uncle greggy, tell kristin that the girls are SO excited. dresses fit. check. dancing shoes purchased. check. socks purchased. check. adorabe haircuts. check. we're ready!
• dear mom, i miss you.

i woke up thinking it was thursday....

and i was pleasantly surprised to find out it's friday!

hello again........how are you blogland? my lack of blogging (and thus your lack of commenting) has me missing you.

guess that's what happens when you have a wonky week. needless to say, i've been a little "off" since the whole starbucks incident. it's taken a whole week for my system to work that caffeine jolt out of my system. you can guarantee i won't be drinking any of that ever again even though i asked (and asked again) that it be DECAF.

but, after all the racing heart issues, and non-sleeping issues, and tremors, i think i'm on the road to normal. it's quite a debilitating feeling. i also plan on looking into drug toxicity in your system for one of the medications i take because it causes all the same symptoms.

on another note, i'm still all confused with our new summer schedule. i crave routine, and i haven't been very good at keeping myself on a routine lately. meaning, there's been no strict bedtime for the kiddos....anytime before 10 seems good, no setting the alarm clock for me in the morning---so far emma waking up has been my alarm clock and it's worked so far. but with that comes the notion that i must be flexible in the mornings and understand that i might not get any freelance work done if she sleeps in til 815 like she's done the last two days in a row! glorious, glorious sleep considering she's normally up at the butt-crack of dawn. "sun's up mommy, sun's up!" i'm not liking the daylight savings time so well when the sun is seemingly up at 530am. so, it's been fun getting an extra hour or so of sleep, but it's drastically cutting down my productivity in the freelance world.

anywho. random, i know.

i feel like i have a whole lot of catching up to do. truth is, i do. the problems last week also brought along the inability to concentrate or focus, meaning....no blogging, no photo editing....phftp....no photo TAKING, and just complete irritability....and a touch of depression trying to make itself cozy. i wasn't having any of that! the inappropriate sinus tachycardia feels like running a marathon when you're sitting doing nothing. exhausting.

i still have lots to blog about, but at what point does week old news become interesting again? a week feels like SO incredibly long ago.

• i still have to tell you about the last day of school and the awards ceremony, but my email isn't opening for me to get the picture off of it that my friend Kay so graciously converted from RAW to jepg for me.
• i still have to share how we spent last friday night!
• i still have to share ashlyn's new addiction---jumprope. i still can't believe that my awkwardly uncoordinated child can jumprope. and she's quite good at it.
• i still have to tell you about emma & preschool
• i still have a mountain of new artwork that is just too adorable not to scan and share.
• i still have a couple GIVEAWAYS that need given away

AND...................

i have another BIG ANNOUNCEMENT coming up on MONDAY! you won't want to miss it because a giveaway WILL be involved, for sure!

upcoming tomorrow....... how we're spending our summer vacation: without breaking the bank.